My name is Jordan and I am the founder of Effin' Done. I was in the fitness industry for over a decade, ranging from teaching yoga, personal fitness training and being a certified sports nutrition coach. After coaching for several years I became a certified firearms instructor too. I had a coaching business called Alpha Maiden, where I integrated various components of these elements to educate women. My mission was to empower women to become strong, resilient and self-reliant. 

Then 2020 happened. Everything, and seemingly everyone went crazy. People who usually could agree to disagree, were now at each other's throats. You couldn't scroll anything on social media without being sucked into a political culture war. The division among everyone grew greater by the day.

Then I had my beautiful daughter in 2021. All my years of coaching, and feeling called to educate and empower women on a large scale vanished. My entire purpose in life changed. My purpose was now to raise this beautiful baby girl, a miracle gifted to me from God. My purpose was to raise her, love her and protect her.

After having my baby I became a SAHM. It was a big change from being the "boss bitch, A-type personality" who worked full time and still managed teaching classes and running a coaching business on the side. However, despite the abrupt change, staying home with my daughter has been the most fulfilling thing I've ever done. My husband has been nothing short of supportive in every way imaginable, and this has allowed me to fully embrace my femininity, and being a nurturing wife and mother. Since I’ve had the freedom to embrace my feminine side, I’ve not only been happier and more fulfilled, my creative side has skyrocketed too.

As a woman with an entrepreneurial spirit, I had some ideas floating around in my head of new projects I wanted to undertake. Meanwhile, it seemed that the world just kept spiraling and that there is always some new catastrophe to worry about. 

The news and social media is constantly inundated with more stories to fuel outrage and cause division, and most of them never offer solutions. It’s just a perpetual cycle of the next thing to panic about. Once you open your eyes that this is all done by design, to keep us divided and easier to manipulate and control, you wake up to all the smoke and mirrors. 

This, among a few other things, is where Effin’ Done comes in. 

I started Effin’ Done because a time came into my life that I had had enough. I was done with fretting over things I couldn’t control.

I was done with spending hours scrolling online, wasting time being distracted and getting upset by political propaganda that was specifically created to manufacture outrage and division among We The People. I was done constantly worrying about money and being in debt. I was done being plugged into the matrix.


I was Effin’ Done. 


This new chapter is to let all of that go and focus on getting my own house in order. 

To focus on being present with my family. 

To focus on creating another income stream so we can pay off debt, save money and build our dream, so that my family can live life on our terms.

To focus on me and my family's mental, physical and spiritual health. 


The foundation of Effin’ Done is to let these items on my site remind you to step away from the distractions and focus on what’s most important; getting your own house in order. Stop reacting to things you can’t control and focus on what you can. We can change the world by first changing ourselves. We can change the course by first deciding we will not play in the game of distraction and division. 


That’s why the clothing and mugs I have on my site are filled with sarcasm and dry humor. Sometimes with all the chaos going on in the world, we need a little dry humor to address it and a reminder that we’re no longer playing the game. Every snarky remark is a statement that you’re unplugging from the matrix.


Join me and declare your independence from the world's chaos by supporting Effin’ Done.

Supporting my small business is your declaration of independence in a world where common sense is not common.

Treat yourself or gift it to someone who's ready to join the 'Effin' Done' club.

Get yourself a daily reminder to stay strong and focused; and conquer the chaos. 


Join the Effin’ Done Club if you’re:

  • Effin’ Done with allowing your life to be on auto-pilot

  • Effin’ Done with distractions

  • Effin’ Done reacting to manufactured outrage

  • Effin’ Done with fabricated division

  • Effin’ Done being plugged into the matrix


By supporting me you’re not only Effin’ Done with all the BS, you’re ready to focus on getting your house in order too. We need to get our own houses in order, unite and stand together to make lasting change.